CNY sucks.
Seriously, other than gg zoo with my boyfriend family, nothing was pretty making me happy.
I don't understand why must my mum makes me angry every single day instead of making it my day. I am so pissed off. Like, straight after cny, she told me that she withdraw so much money just for that dumbass flamingo tenant that wants to move out. Next, she told me not to withdraw money anymore and want to get 10 dollars from me because her ez link card no money. Think of the past few days, did she give me money? I don't think so. I've been like wondering around at my house! Other than first day and second day of cny. First day of cny, pretty much a pissing day. Waited for aunt for like half an hour when she said she's reaching soon and she's living like fuck near the place we meeting?
I was so damn hungry but I was waiting for her to bring us to relative house and eat some goodies. End up, we have to spend the money ourselves just for a fast food and share among my mum and myself.
If my mum needs money, might as well just take all my ang pows money and not letting me to keep all by myself. I thought I could go have fun for at least once and not spending more than half of my ang pows money. End up, I've to give her and like, I got no point of gg out because I can't withdraw money, my ang pow money only left like $26 because I didnt visit much relatives. Like only visit 1 relative house when I received 2 ang pows? Another 2 ang pow from my boyfriend hse? Look, how pathetic I am now. Not that I don't wanna save money, my mum don't really even let me withdraw unless she needs money. I seriously hate this kind of life. I wanna look for a job, but I just couldn't bear my boyfriend because he's gg NS. I want to spend more time with him before he's gg in. I really feel this year totally suck. I hate 2o1o. Please, kill me. I don't wanna live in such conditions anymore. My life for these years have been down and no ups. Really. Ever since my dad pass away, nothing good has happened to me. I've no idea what to do anymore. When my boyfriend go ns, I might just kill myself instead of living. Noone is there to cheer me up anymore. I'm just anti social. It's been a torture for myself. That's how I felt. Even till now. I've got so much more of unhappiness than happiness. Let me die please. I think suffering in hell is better than suffering here. Because everyone in hell is suffering, but at here, not all are suffering. Only those unlucky ones will be suffering.
That's all I could say.
Below are some pictures taken yesterday at the trip in zoo and my cny look. I look real old when I put on make up.
